Embracing the Voice of Diversity in the Adult Industry

Written By Pleasure Product Retail Expert Danielle Seerley — As an industry, we fight battles on many fronts every day.  We adopt a collective voice when it comes to topics that we are passionate about not only for ourselves but for everyone around us.  We fight for people to have access to free sex education, whether it’s through our business or not.  We fight for people to be able to shop in an adult store like they would any other store.  We stay steadfast that store windows won’t be blacked out or unfairly restricted.  We fight to give a voice to those in our community who need it, or our support in their own personal endeavors.  To those who may not have the same platforms we do.  Whether it be the sales floor of a retail store, the podcast of a manufacturer, or an online store help section.  We tenaciously press forward to give everyday people a safe place to pursue pleasure products of interest or of purpose.  We fight for people like ourselves who should have the same opportunities we have for an uncomplicated relationship with their bodies.

Part of uncomplicating that relationship is embracing the diversity of our bodies as much as we do the diversity of our voices.   As manufacturers or retailers, we listen to what people ask for when it comes to our product.  We get daily feedback on ways to enhance both our products and our processes.  We take what we learn and make it better.  Not rocket science but evidence of the mobility we have when it comes to improving our immediate business.

When asked on the spot, most people will define body diversity as being accepting of all bodies.  All body sizes, shapes, colors, genders, or non-genders.  On the spot, what does the celebration of body diversity looks like?  We may be applauding the arrival of a long-overdue movement, but are we practicing what we preach?

Pleasure product companies are uniquely positioned to embrace body diversity and our industry has begun to demonstrate the agility we have when it comes to listening to customers.  Customers who want products that reflect them.   The packaging is moving away from the “Victoria Secret Model” body type to bodies that reflect the average size person.   Size 14 is no longer considered the average size; it is a 16/18.  As more women continue to take on decision-making roles, packaging and products will continue to reflect that evolution in the workplace.  These women are designing packaging and products that fit not only themselves but the diverse group of people they know. 

One of my favorite new trends in packaging is that there is less editing of bodies on packages and less photoshopping and airbrushing. It feels good to look at a product and be able to see yourself in it.  To see curves, rolls, softness, skin imperfections, body hair…all the things we may see as flaws in ourselves, are being normalized and celebrated.  I’m excited to see the perception of adult products change as we not only make them more accessible but more inclusive.  To ensure that we have the products, materials, sizes, shapes, colors people want and need.  That options exist not because there is something wrong with you, but because we all deserve equal pleasure.

I also hope that as an industry we encourage the conversation.  We aren’t afraid to talk about the things that make us different.  The lube industry absolutely thrives on talking about the needs of a variety of bodies, skin types, viscosity preferences, toy use, flavored, thick, think, smooth.  There is a formula for EVERYONE with every want and need you could think of.  Sensitive skin? Got it.  Like it au natural? Done.  Need a flavor for extra sensitive skin? Let’s mix a cocktail.  Bottom line…let’s talk about it and find what works for you.  There is no wrong answer or universal formula for everyone. 

How amazing will it be when we find the path to talk about toys the same way.  What if we could see more of our true selves reflected in the packaging and imagery used in the adult industry? What if as an industry, we shifted our focus to partnering with models and ambassadors who look more like the women we know and love.  To design packaging that doesn’t look like the “New Year’s Body Resolution” mainstream media has told us was the only shape that was “sexy” or “sexual”.  But instead designing packaging that reflects real people, celebrating their bodies as is.  

The best part of helping to celebrate each other, is we help celebrate ourselves a little along the way. 

Self-care isn’t the greatest revolution, loving yourself is.